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iBrotha anim_logo
iBrotha
by Rodney O. Lain


Rodney Interviews Creator Of Netscape 6, 'Flower Power' Colors & The Mood-Ring iMac
February 22nd, 2000

Deadlines are the mothers of invention

John Shanahan

 

As soon as I enter Mac Daddy's Cupertino apartment, my nose is assailed with the unmistakable scent of marijuana.

"Hey, whassup, Rodney-podney," rasps Mac Daddy, with that husky voice a dopehead makes when he is both trying to talk and trying not to exhale his "hit."

I knew you were a dopehead, but this is too much smoke, even for you! And on a weeknight!

"I'm celebratin', my brotha."

Celebrating what? And who is that sitting over there on the couch with his head laid back?

"Never mind him. He's so high that his nose is bleedin'"

What are you celebratin' at 10 o'clock at night?

"Apple just shipped one of my new designs."

What? [I start laughing.] You mean that you designed the "Dalmatian" and "Flower Power" iMac colors?

"Hell, yeah. Apple hired me last year when they saw the other thing I was working on."

And what was that?

"Netscape 6."

You don't know how to program. How could you design Netscape 6?

"I don't program. I design. I designed the 'gooey'."

Oh, so that explains it.

"What you say, wussy?"

Nothing.

"Anyway, I was sitting there smoking a big, fat 'blunt' at a party, talking about what I would do if I was in charge of Netscape. Some people from Netscape heard me talking and told me they could get me a job there if I let them hit that gunja I was rolling."

You got a job at Netscape by smoking weed with some of the company's programmers?

"Ain't that how ev'rybody get they job? Besides, it was some good gunja. And you know programmers will do anything for good gunja."

Yeah. Now what does this have to do with the "Flower Power" and "Dalmatian" colored iMacs?

"Everything. I was sittin' there passing a fatty with Steve when I dropped my mood-ring-iMac idea on him. Just about when the buzz hit him."

YOU were smoking a, um, "fatty" with Steve Jobs? Yeah, right...

"Don't ev'rybody? Hey, boy. This is Cuper-funkin'-tino. Ev'rybody at Apple is a smoker."

So, a mood-ring iMac?

"Yeah. I told Steve that the biggest problem with iMacs is the colors. But the biggest good thing 'bout iMacs is the colors. So I told him to let me create them mood-ring iMac that changes colors with your mood, ending all of the inventory problems with running out of Indigo, while they can't give away Key Lime."

But, we don't see any mood-ring iMac...

"Because Steve wasn't listening to me at first. He had to go and make a Dorito run..."

Look. I don't have time for this. I have to go before I get high from second-hand smoke. You must think I'm a real fool to believe that you created a Mood-Ring iMac color. And you must think I'm a fool to believe that Apple would sell it to customers.

"Hey, they did just introduce 'Dalmatian' and 'Flower Power.'

Touché.

"Yeah, they smoked a lot of dope when they came up with those colors. Why, just tonight, Steve said..."

Wait a minute. You spoke with Steve tonight?

"Hell, yeah. He the one sitting over there with his head hanging over the couch."

Your comments are welcomed.

Rodney O. Lain is a junior manager at a major corporation. He enjoys public speaking, mentoring minority college students, and helping community multicultural-awareness efforts. He also "preaches the Gospel" at a Minneapolis Micro Center -- he's the bald black guy. Rodney "drives" a G4 Cube and a PowerBook G3. After enjoying a popular run at Mac Addict.com, "iBrotha" was axed, to readers' dismay. Back by popular demand, it now runs exclusively at Mac Observer every other Friday, replacing "Rodney's Soapbox."

[Editor's Note: Rodney O.Lain passed away in June, 2002.]

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