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My wife and I steal each others contact info  



This is both MacOS and iOS, probably an iCloud thing.  

Currently, my phone (and MacOS account) think I'm my wife.  If I do something with Siri, she calls me by my wife's name and if I try to enter info in a web page (name, email, etc.), it is  my wife's information that can be autofilled. 

I know I can switch this under iOS under settings -> Siri & Seach -> My information or my contact info as "My Card" under Contacts on MacOS seems to do the same thing.   If I switch using either method, then my wife's phone this that she is me.  

We each have separate apple IDs that are under family sharing.  We do both share a contact list under separate (not hers or mine) Apple ID.  

This has been going on a few months (pre- iOS 13).  We both have our phones up to date and MacOS is on Catalina. 

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2 Answers

Even though I said there was answer, this problem persisted.  We finally have a satisfactory answer and I'm posting this just to clarify and if anyone runs into this problem.

I think the problem comes from sharing a contact list as our only contact list.  As stated above, we had all our contacts via an iCloud account separate from both of ours.  We had been doing this for years, probably going back to the beginning of 

To fix the problem of stealing each other's contact info, I did the following:

  1. In my iCloud account I turned on contact syncing and I copied over both mine and my wife's contacts. 
  2. In her iCloud account I turned on contact syncing and I copied over both mine and my wife's contacts. 
  3. I deleted my contact info and my wife's from the shared account.
  4. On my Mac account and my iPhone I selected my contact info as "Make this my info..."
  5. On my wife's Mac account and her iPhone I selected her contact info as "Make this my info..."

So far, I think this has done it.  As I mentioned above, I think the problem is the way that the "my info" is stored in both iOS and MacOS.  It seems that in a contact list, there is some flag on some contact that say "THIS IS ME" and anyone using that list gets that contact as the personal info. 

It seems that if you have multiple lists that there can be multiple "THIS IS ME" contacts, at least in MacOS.  In the contacts app, there is a person icon next to the "THIS IS ME" contact and there were times as I was troubleshooting this problem, that I had more than one person icon on a contact.  

Here's hoping that this solutions works...



I think I found an answer. First, I'm sure it was the fact that we were sharing the same contact list via a 3rd apple ID. Somehow it must be that within the contact list that a contact was flagged as the "My Info" contact as opposed to each of our accounts "pointing" to a contact, which makes more sense to do. 

To get around this, I first turned off the Contacts setting on the 3rd apple ID and enabled Contacts on my primary ID. Then I copied over my info as the only contact in my primary ID contact list and selected it as my info under Contacts. I then turned back on the 3rd apple ID contact list and things seem to be okay.

However, I needed to do this on my iPhone, a separate laptop as well to get it working on everything.