How To Install Windows XP In Only 147 Steps

W hile we are enjoying ourselves at Microsoftis expense, we thought it a good idea to pass on a very funny Blog entry from Mark Pilgrim about installing Windows XP. While this is not the sort of informative piece about Microsoft we normally do for those readers who enjoy keeping up on Big Redmond, there is an iMac reference that keeps it in the family rather nicely. In addition, itis far too entertaining not to mention it. From the introduction:

My Windows XP installation has reached its half-life. (You do know that every Windows installation has a half-life, right? Every copy of Windows naturally degrades along a curve until it becomes annoying, then unbearable, then unusable. Each successive revision of Windows has a slightly longer half-life. Windows 95 lasted about 3 months. This copy of Windows XP has lasted me almost 9. Iim not bitter; when you realize that youire measuring on a logarithmic scale, a factor of 3 improvement is really quite impressive.)

Specifically, my Windows XP laptop can no longer (a) print, (b) sleep, or (c) change network settings without crashing. This is not multiple choice; it canit do any of those things. Itis time for a re-install.

What follows is a very long list of steps that Mr. Pilgrim goes through for his installation. While some 147 steps are included, many are there strictly for humoris sake, such as "Reboot," followed by "Doesnit work." We pulled some of the most entertaining for your benefit, including our favorite, step #1:

1. Back up entire d: drive to iMac upstairs. rsync rocks.

13. "Welcome to Windows XP. You have no useful programs and no internet access. You have 30 days left for activation. Would you like to activate now?" Yes, I would, but I have no internet access.

39. "Add your .NET Passport to Windows XP!" No.

51. "Windows Update has found 39 critical updates and service packs." Install now.

103. Delete everything in Start menu. Windows Catalog. Windows Update. Outlook Express. Tour Windows XP. Games. Accessories. MSN Messenger. Make mental note to look up how to completely uninstall MSN Messenger.

Check out the full story at Mark Pilgrimis Dive Into Mark Web site.